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Sunday, July 31, 2005

I am HOME.

Here is my poetic tribute to RAGBRAI:
To Iowa and its cities
Your scenery is so pretty
It really is a pitty
Your roads are paved so shitty

I know... the poet laureate of Gibson County. Incredible.

Well, I am alive. And that's really what counts, right? I hated the majority of the trip. However, I can now justify going and getting a pedicure. HAHA! Those people are going to be like "what have you done to your feet" and I'll be all like "I rode 500 miles in seven days... now make me pretty."

Mysteries of Iowa:
Soda is pop, beer is water
Porta potties are "Kybo"s (I can only guess that this stands for "krap your butt off")
Cell service is foreign
Amish are allowed to have phones if not in the house
Smoothie vendors think bicycling is a stand against oil wars
99.5% of inhabitants would not even be considered mildly good looking (English teeth...*shudder*)

Funniest thing I saw:
"A man is like a watermelon. You have to thump him before you know how good he is."

I met some cool people. I rode every day, didn't sag once. Only walked 3 hills (on the last day... those were pretty much mountainous). I probably will not go back, but I'm told that's what everyone says. If I do, I vow to be skinnier than Tasha... just to make her uncomfortable. Ha. I'm told the ride is not worth going on unless you're 21. Maybe I'll give it another shot next year. Haha. Shot. That was a booze reference. We all know I'm a lush. Anyway... if I do, I'm totally taking someone fun. It's no fun hanging out with the oldies at the tent while your dad and all the people your age go out and get smashed at the beer gardens. Blah.

Wildlife report:
I took a picture of a goat for Lizz... I only saw 4 the whole time and 3 were on display in a town. So I only saw one natural goat. That's a shame that they have so much farm space and don't take advantage of the cute factor of goats. One of the pinned goats tried to eat my bike gloves... I thought about stealing him... couldn't figure out how not to get caught. Saw a camel. That's right. Um... almost took a puppy home the last day. It was half basset hound half pitbull and the cutest thing ever. It was in the second to last town... again... couldn't figure out how to get it 20 miles down the road. Damn.

Final thoughts:
The thing that annoyed me most was people assuming I was 15. People in Iowa are pretty tall. They do not understand that people under 5'5" are actually just little human beings. I was so tired of people saying "you'll have to wait five years till this ride is fun." Okay idiots... how many 15 year olds have sassy, red hair and piercings and act not like a teenybopper. STUPID. Oh yah. By the end of the week, I lost all my piercings. One by one they said "fuck this hard work shit! I'm out!" Oh well! Katie and I must go to Vincinnes this week and get holed up. I may get some ink in celebration of this momentous accomplishment. Hells yah.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 8:28 AM

Thursday, July 21, 2005

I think you should all know, before I go far away and possibly die, that I prefer the crumblies at the bottom of a Grippo bag to actual full Grippos. That's pretty much it.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 8:44 PM

I have to remember to count my blessings even when things around me all seem bad. There is good left.

I am so lucky to have someone so wonderful. Trust.

I am leaving to ride across Iowa. Here's the rundown...
Miles/day:
Sun- 65.5
Mon-84.4
Tues- 62
Wed- 83.7
Thurs- 78.3
Fri- 57.1
Sat- 54

Five of the seven days of the 2005 Register Annual Great Bicycle Ride Across Iowa feature relatively easy terrain. The final two days include some big ups and downs as the ride heads into the Mississippi bluff lands, but this route isn't as hilly as some in northeast Iowa.After years of proving to newcomers that Iowa isn't as flat as they think it is, this will be a RAGBRAI that's an exception to the rule. It's flatter than most and will feature:

• The fifth least feet of climbing of any RAGBRAI.
• A tie for the 16th fewest miles, at 485.
• Overall the fifth easiest ride, judged by the combination of miles and climb
.And for all the whiners who complained about a few little stretches of gravel last year (just because it happened to rain on a gravel day), the 2005 route has no gravel (barring last-minute route changes).For the reasonably well-conditioned cyclist, this RAGBRAI should be a breeze.

Figuratively speaking - literally speaking, a breeze could be a problem.

The flat, open terrain of northern Iowa offers magnificent vistas, but almost no shelter. In heat and head winds, flat ground quickly loses its appeal. So daydream about a mild summer and gentle tailwinds, but train yourself for a tough ride, just in case.The weather is the biggest unknown on any RAGBRAI, but there is never any uncertainty about the warm welcome in the overnight communities and the pass-through towns. RAGBRAI XXXIII revisits several of the most well-remembered towns. (How many past riders have a photo of themselves by the world's biggest bullhead at Crystal Lake or the home of Bily Clocks in Spillville?)
Along with many old favorites, there will be a new starting point this year and one new overnight stop.

Le Mars, on the Floyd River in Plymouth County, has been a pass-through town three times previously but never the launching point for RAGBRAI.Northwood to GuttenbergNorthwood in Worth County is a town of 2,050 just four miles from the Minnesota border. RAGBRAI passed through in 1996 but has never stopped overnight. Northwood's main street is being restored. A county fairground is being improved, and a city park on a bend in the Shell Rock River is described as one of the most pleasant park sites in Iowa.

There are also three new pass-through towns - Sanborn in northwest Iowa, Stacyville and Lime Springs in the northeast.

If this year's ride has a theme, it might be seen as a tour of northern Iowa's varied cultural roots. The starting point, Le Mars, had an unusual beginning as an experimental place for the second sons of British gentry to learn about agriculture.From there, the parade of Iowa heritages passes through Dutch country in Sioux County. Fort Defiance State Park at Estherville is a reminder that American Indians once occupied the vast prairie.

There is a wide swath with a Scandinavian flavor featuring big, sturdy Lutheran churches, a restored pioneer farm near Wallingford and a statue dedicated to Norwegian settlers at Lake Mills.Then it's onward through Amish settlements in Mitchell and Howard counties, and chances to experience Czech heritage in Protivin and Spillville. The ending town, Guttenberg, rests at the foot of spectacular Mississippi River bluffs and features German architecture.

Here's a day-by-day look at what to expect:Day by day

Day 1 - Near Le Mars, Iowa's steep Loess Hills fade into gentle swells. Expect a few hills as the ride begins and scenery that includes picturesque views of terraced fields. The hills and the terraces continue into Sioux County and through the side-by-side neighbors of Alton and Orange City. The land becomes more gentle approaching the overnight in Sheldon.

Day 2 - The route follows a checkerboard path as it strikes out across the broad, flat prairies of northern Iowa, heading south, then east, then north, then east for a long stretch that skirts the Iowa Great Lakes region at Milford. A notable landmark is a wind farm to the north as the route approaches Milford. Then it's north into Estherville on undulating, occasionally rough road. At more than 84 miles, this is the longest ride of the week.

Day 3 - The ride heads south into what was once the marshy prairie pothole region of Iowa, turning east across the West Fork of the Des Moines River and curling around the edge of scenic Ingham Lake. After passing through Ringsted ("A Small Town with Big Ideas"), the route heads due south for about 16 straight miles to Whittemore. This could be a grueling stretch if there happens to be a strong south wind. The route continues on mostly flat ground and through some scenic woods on the approach to Algona on the East Fork of the Des Moines River for the overnight. Day 3 also features the optional John Karras memorial loop for those riders who want to experience a 100-mile day.

Day 4 - Continuing through flat to gently rolling open country, the ride heads north and east through the prairie communities of Titonka, Woden and Crystal Lake, north through Thompson, then due east through Lake Mills and beyond toward the Top of Iowa Welcome Center on Interstate Highway 35. The crossing of the interstate is the traditional halfway point. It's just five miles before arriving at Northwood for the night.

Day 5 - This day continues mostly due east, with a few north-south jogs. The terrain continues to be mostly flat with some undulations. There is nice scenery approaching St. Ansgar along the Cedar River. The roads are a little rough in some spots, and occasional hills begin to appear. Heading toward Cresco for the night, riders may notice some Amish farms along the highways.

Day 6 - The land begins to change beyond Cresco. Hills become more frequent, and the prairie begins to be dotted with woodlands. There are picturesque villages such as Spillville and Fort Atkinson. There's a long hill coming out of St. Lucas and several other climbs through scenic country heading southeast into West Union.

Day 7 - This is the shortest ride, about 54 miles, but it also features probably the steepest hill, an 8 percent grade climbing out of Fawn Hollow at St. Olaf. This is followed by a series of lesser hills until it turns onto a portion of the River Bluffs Scenic Byway, which offers fine views along a ridge. The day is a mixture of hills, woods and limestone cuts on sometimes bumpy roads. Riders might glimpse an occasional eagle soaring above the bluffs. The last leg follows the Great River Road southward along the crest of the Mississippi bluffs. Extreme caution is urged on the long, steep descent into the valley before arriving in Guttenberg.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 8:24 PM

The Next Ten Minutes

JAMIE
No, that one's Jerry Seinfeld
That one's John Lennon there
No, the Dakota
The San Remo is up a few blocks
Have you been inside the Museum?
We should go
Meet the dinosaurs
cathy
Will you share your life with me
For the next ten minutes?
For the next ten minutes
We can handle that
We could watch the waves
We could watch the sky
Or just sit and wait
As the time ticks by
And if we make it till then
Can I ask you again
For another ten?
And if you in turn agree
To the next ten minutes
And the next ten minutes
Till the morning comes
Then just holding you
Might compel me to
Ask you for more
There are so many lives
I want to share with you
I will never be complete until I do

CATHERINE
I'm not always on time
Please don't expect that from me
I will be late
But if you can just wait
I will make it eventually
Not like it's in my control
Not like I'm proud of the fact
But anything other than being exactly on time
I can do
I don't know why people run
I don't know why things fall through
I don't know how anybody survives in this life
Without someone like you
I could protect and preserve
I could say no and goodbye
But why, Jamie, why?
I want to be your wife
I want to bear your child
I want to die
Knowing I
Had a long, full life in your arms
That I can do
Forever, with you

JAMIE
Will you share your life with me

CATHERINE
Forever

JAMIE
For the next ten lifetimes?

CATHERINE
Forever, Jamie

JAMIE
For a million summers

BOTH
Till the world explodes
Till there's no one left
Who has ever known us apart

JAMIE
There are so many dreams
I need to see with you...

CATHERINE
There are so many years
I need to be with you...

JAMIE
I will never be complete

CATHERINE
I will never be alive

JAMIE
I will never change the world
Until I do

CATHERINE
I do

JAMIE
I do

CATHERINE
I do

BOTH
I do...

CATHERINE
Is that one John Lennon?
That's the San Remo
Isn't that the Museum?
Can we go see the dinosaurs?
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 9:54 AM

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

I just had a dream that I was doing all the things I have already doing or am supposed to do today. Um. WEIRD.

My stomach hurts. BLECH. I want a diet sprite.

BLECH BLECH BLECH.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 6:00 PM

I am taking back my mean comment about phone calls. I do suck at it. But that was meaner than it should have been.

Skindred was cancelled. Typical. I would have cried if I had been alone. But I still got to spend time with Melissa and Butta and Katie and the guys, which was nice. I like Butta a lot. FLUMP!
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 4:20 PM

I got my lip pierced yesterday. It looked pretty hot. Looked. I took it out already. I can't tell you how bad it hurt. And when I tried to pop a spacer in for work today, it was like gravel in an open wound. I decided, skip the spacer, let it heal. The swelling is already receding. YAY. I still can't have dairy or open mouth kisses or yeasty alcohol for 6 more days... but I think oral piercings just aren't going to be my thing. Next time I'll do something more practical.

Oh yah, and I forgot to mention...
I'm in love... le sigh!
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 5:58 AM

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Going to put yet another hole in my face. Wish me luck... my tummy is churning in anticipation.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 2:15 PM

I hate when people lie about me. Especially when that lie portrays me as an insensitive, uncaring bitch. Look in the mirror. Phones work both ways. I've never been good about calling people, so why would that suddenly change just for one person? If you're my friend, you'll accept that I have phone issues and move the fuck on. Maybe once you're working fourteen hour days and driving hours to and from jobs you can come talk to me about how heartless I am. I don't have time for this shit anymore. Grow up.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 12:42 PM

Monday, July 18, 2005

Someday I hope to impact your life as greatly as she has, except with positive experiences.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 5:18 PM

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Welllllll... I have decided I like this blog better. Mostly because I like the people who read it. HA. And I like those people mostly because they don't judge me. Thanks you guys.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 9:14 PM

Kristen Chenowith was adorable in Bewitched btw.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 4:00 PM

I arrived home tonight at 12:30... my parents were nowhere to be found. I am freaked out. Perhaps someone is hurt or dead. I now know how they felt for the past 20 years. Or maybe they're making out in the minivan somewhere... EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

I was suprised by Cari, Cami, Brittany, Brittany (there's two, I didn't accidently type it twice), and Audrey while closing at the store tonight. Oh my goodness. And we went to see Bewitched (for free). And I love/miss my friends. I wish Iweremorereliable/theywereconvenientlycloser. It's so weird. I was just being me. But they kind of looked at me like I had changed. I bet I have... it's been two years since Gib-So. I'm glad I'm comfortable being me. Even though sometimes it felt like an out of body experiencing I had sort of faked me during high school. Like, I gave them a taste of me... but they didn't know that I really was a big dorky idiot with horrible jokes. They just thought I was sort of funny and sort of a nerdy. Anyway. Now they know and still want to hang out with me on Friday. If only I had known... then I would have had so many more years of big dorky idiotism. Idiotism sounds like a disease. Perhaps it is.
ANYWAY. What I was originally going to say is that, unlike everyone else in the world, my already perfect high school friends had not gained the freshman/sophomore 15/50. In fact, they had all LOST WEIGHT. And I felt like even more of a heffer than I did in high school. You would know if you saw my friends. UGH. Plus, no lying, I've gained a little since graduation. Not even the normal 15... but really... when they lose weight it's like making up for it... in comparison. I don't know if anyone's following what I'm saying. In comparison to their bodies having lost weight, I definitely look like I've gained the dreaded lump of weight. And that sucks. I am determined not to be "that girl" at our five year reunion. Which is slowly creeping up. Crap. Get to work, Bessie.
My friends made me smile and enjoy life despite their narrowing waistlines. It was like a magic two hour portal that took me back to times that were more simple. Where rent and Vectren weren't due. Where twelve hour workdays didn't interfere with keeping in touch. Where internet and satelite television were provided by people who now run around making out in the minivan in the middle of the night (you thought I was over that, but I wasn't). Where boys were the main topic of conversation only surpassed from time to time by music/theatre/dance/otherartsyfartsytopics. Life moves on... but tonight... I felt the simplicity of those four years. I wish I would have realized then how much less hectic it really was. I would have enjoyed those moments of calm more instead of shoving in as much as I could. I wouldn't have been able to appreciate it though, I fear. What a blessing.

I love his voice and his laughter and the way my face hurts from smiling when I hear those things.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 12:35 AM

Monday, July 11, 2005

Today I wished that I were a stronger person. Then I realized strong people snap. Soft people smoosh. And flexible people can bend to the circumstances. Maybe I'm trying to be too strong and thus snapping. Hmmm.

I am a little manic lately. I think I've got some hormone imbalances going on. Like crazy. AH. CALM DOWN.

It's not you, it's me. This could be true. We resist what is good for us for fear of losing it. Sometimes holding so tightly to it is just another way of not looking at it... you can't really see it if it's pressed into you. Maybe it's like a pixalation paintint... you must stay the appropriate distance to experience its entirity. YIKES.

I am embarrassed by my actions. By my reactions. By my doubts. It is not fair to punish others with my own insecurities. Especially not at 2 in the morning.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 10:54 PM

I'm back to the blog. I'm sick of myspace. I'm sick of hearing a certain person's comments. I'm sick of knowing I'll never live up to that or get what they had. They destroyed it. It's fucking gone. Some great thing to live up to, right?
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 1:32 AM

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

UGH... I hate going to the doctor... guys are so lucky... UGH...
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 4:09 PM

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

I love Butta...

Sometimes it just overwhelms me so much that if I don't say it, I think I'm going to explode.
And there's no one here to say it to... so I typed it. TAKE THAT.

DONE
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 11:30 PM

Monday, July 04, 2005

Happy 4th!
Don't play with fire.

I am working again at Seekers on day shifts... I know... that's soooooooooo exciting :) Monay! And I get to talk to Ruth and get paid for it... muahahaha...
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 8:51 AM

Friday, July 01, 2005

I am going to puke. Seriously. This thought that something bad is going to happen in Boston keeps haunting me. I am going to puke.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 11:49 AM

Do not eat pizza and drink wine at midnight... it does not make your body feel good the next day.
posted by The Impossibly Cute One on 8:28 AM